A Message For My Son

Frankie Jr. and his team had a great football season (10W-2l) this year but had a devastating loss their final game.  After a very strong semi-final game where everything went right, they couldn’t catch the break they needed to win the last game. This is my message for my son and his teammates:

Winning doesn’t make you great. What makes you great is the fire inside your heart. The ability to stay focused on the ultimate prize. The tenacity to stick with it, each and every day. The desire to wake up and start fresh on your new goal. Winning is not letting defeat win. You cannot be defeated unless you give up. Quitters never win, but winners have to learn how to lose to get stronger. Let the fire in your heart burn deep. Let the pain and sorrow of a loss ignite the passion to dig deeper into your body, mind and soul. A victory is short lived but a loss makes you think long and hard during the off-season. Which will you choose? Self loathing, excuses and blame, thinking: is it time to give up? Or will you pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start training to be even better and stronger for the next season? If it is raining or snowing outside and you know your competition is inside having hot cocoa and playing video games, will you join them? Or will you be working on your mental game, working on building a stronger body, making yourself quicker and more agile, learning new plays and studying video of your heroes training and competing. What am I going to do today to help me win tomorrow? Every day you must choose an action, however small or insignificant it may seem, to build towards your ultimate goal on and off the field. Only you can choose. Take the loss and make it work for you. There will be many moments of disappointments in your life. What you decide to do with it is what makes you a winner. Take the emotion and bottle it. Use it when you think you are at the top of your game. Recall the battle that was lost. Take the feeling and ask yourself, can I throw further, can I hit harder, can I run faster? Did I leave anything on the field or did I play with my entire mind, body and soul? Did I give it my all? Battles are practice for life. Life will take you and chew you up and split you out. Are you ready to stop, rebuild, and return bigger, stronger, faster? Or will you let one single moment in life destroy you. Anyone can be a great winner when they have a great game. I want you to be winner by learning how to take a bad game, one moment of disappointment and frustration, and turn that into a little fire that burns in your heart and soul and builds and builds, stronger and stronger, creating a locomotion of desire, passion and motivation to do great things in your life. I believe in you with all my heart. Love, Daddy

 

Momma Tank, big brother, Frank the Tank, little brothers, the Sherman Tanks

  

Winning the Semi-finals. Time to Celebrate!

  

Frankie Jr.— Focused!

  

Frankie Jr.— Strong Hold

  

Frankie Jr.— Making His Move

  

We Are Family — Your Biggest Fans!!!

  

Little Tanks — Your Biggest Fans!!!

  

Little Tanks — Your Biggest Fans!!!

  

Wallkill vs High Point – Finals

  

Frankie Jr.— Making His Move

  

Wallkill vs High Point – Finals

  

Little Tanks — Your Biggest Fans!!!

  

Wallkill vs High Point – Finals

  

Wallkill vs High Point – Finals

  

Wallkill vs High Point – Finals

  

Wallkill vs High Point – Finals

  

We Are Family — Your Biggest Fans!!!

 

Photos by FRANK CUNHA III (2015)

Media: Nikon D90 DSLR

Post Edits: iPhoto, Instagram

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10 STEPS TO GETTING THINGS DONE: WHAT MY KIDS TAUGHT ME ABOUT LEADERSHIP AND TEAM BUILDING

I often compare working with adults to working with children. Here is a list of suggestions to getting something done, whether it is other colleagues at work or your kids at home.

Please share your comments and feedback below this post.

1. SHARE THE VISION
It’s never easy getting someone else to just “buy in” and do something — at least not unless there is some big reward at the end. So share your vision and get “buy in” from your team. If it is possible, allow the team to shape the vision of the project, task, or event.

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2. MOTIVATION
Find out what motivates your team. My wife and I have been procrastinating about swapping out the kids play room with my office. By engaging my team (my kids) while my wife was out, I was able to have them help us jump start the small but arduous task ahead of us (since the two rooms are separated by two flights of stairs).

3. BREAKING DOWN A BIG TASK INTO SMALLER TASKS
Looking at all that needs to be completed is daunting, but when you break down the overall tasks into smaller, manageable tasks it appears doable. As things get done it is easy to keep the momentum going to complete the project and move on to the next one. Do not overwhelm the team — break down the activities into manageable tasks. Be realistic with the schedule to keep them motivated and on track.

4. FEEDBACK
Asking for and receiving continuous feedback helps the team see that their ideas matter. Integrating the team’s ideas into your overall project makes them feel vested in the project. It is easier to get things done when your entire team is on board with where things are headed. In my case, I asked my kids where they wanted to relocate some of the toy “stations” so they could be involved in the decision making process.

5. TAKE A BREAK
OK, playing “Rock, Paper, Scissors” and “Mickey Mouse Built a House, How Many Bricks Did He Use?” (throwbacks from when I was a kid), might not go over well at work. However, taking a break from a task will help recharge and refocus the team. Take this opportunity to encourage and bond with the team. Remind them of the vision.

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6. TEAM BUILDING
Use the break to bond. Whether or not this project is as successful as you envisioned it to be it is a learning opportunity (try to “break the eggs” and learn on the smaller or less important tasks, if you have to). Having a solid team will help with the success of future projects. We can grow from our challenges and experience and learn to work with our strengths (and the strengths of our team).

7. ENCOURAGEMENT
Keep giving the team positive reinforcement (and yourself too). Telling the kids that mommy was going to be “so happy” when she saw what we had undertaken, kept the little troops motivated walking up and down those stairs carrying office supplies and toys on those countless trips up and down stairs.

8. OFFER REWARD
Ice cream after dinner worked in my case. Again, see what motivates the team and offer a reward. It doesn’t necessarily need to be money or a promotion. Something small like a gas card or tickets to the movie or ball game would be a nice token of appreciation for having your tea, finish the job. It makes them feel appreciated and keeps them focused on completing the tasks expeditiously.

9. NEXT PROJECT
Go back to the team and see what ideas they have for the next project. Also remember to ask what the best and worse parts of the project were so that the next project is even more successful. Make a list of “Lessons Learned” so you don’t forget!

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10. MANAGEMENT & PASSING THE TORCH
If you can, avoid being a micro-manager; Next time be part of the team instead of being the leader. Let the others take the role of the committee chair, project managers, etc. What better way to teach leadership then to give someone else a turn to manage a project, task, or event? You can mentor each other (if you are willing to be reversed-mentored). They get a seasoned team member with a wealth of knowledge and experience. It’s a win-win for both and a fantastic way to build a strong, versatile team. It’s also humbling and a great way to see the project from the eyes of the guys in the trenches, which in turn, will make you a better leader for the next big thing.

We would love to hear from you on what you think about this post. We sincerely appreciate all your comments.

If you like this post please share it with friends. And feel free to contact us if you would like to discuss ideas for your next project!

Have a great weekend!

Sincerely,
Frank Cunha III
I Love My Architect – Facebook

FC3 ARCHITECTURE+DESIGN, LLC
P.O. Box 335, Hamburg, NJ 07419
e-mail: fcunha@fc3arch.com
mobile: 201.681.3551
direct: 973.970.3551
fax: 973.718.4641
web: http://fc3arch.com
Licensed in NJ, NY, PA, DE, CT.


Myths about weight loss: Health and fitness tips from an Architect

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I recently lost 40 lbs and went from a size 38 pants to 32.  I want to share some of my tips with my readers to help them get health and fit for 2013.

Beat the stereo-types and myths about weight loss and fitness.

Paying for it

  • Don’t believe the hype you hear!
  • It feels good to flex your “wallet” muscles but don’t waist your money on expensive gadgets
  • Buying magic pills, machines and equipment doesn’t mean it will help you lose weight
  • Your body is your best weapon
  • Don’t believe in Magic; Make it a lifestyle change

Lose weight fast

  • Don’t believe the hype you hear!
  • It takes time to lose weight – don’t rush it
  • Don’t go crazy
  • It’s OK to cheat (once in a while)
  • Don’t be ashamed to use Weightwatchers or other similar programs to help you track calories – Check out the Livestrong app
  • Don’t drink your calories – Drink water with lemon juice
  • Don’t believe in Magic; Make it a lifestyle change

Gain muscle fast

  • Don’t believe the hype you hear!
  • It takes time to gain muscle – don’t rush it
  • Don’t go crazy just “lifting weights” – try to mix it up with cardio
  • It’s OK to miss a work out (once in a while)
  • Be creative: play sports with friends or your kids, try different workouts outside the gym (hiking, beach volleyball, etc.)
  • Build lean muscle mass – It’s easier to maintain than bulk and clothes fit better
  • Don’t believe in Magic; Make it a lifestyle change

Abs in 5 minutes

  • Don’t believe the hype you hear!
  • You cannot target weight loss in your mid-section or anywhere else
  • Hit the treadmill; By doing cardio you burn fat, eventually you will hit all your problem areas over time.
  • Try this Nike Plus app to help you track your jogs/runs
  • Don’t believe in Magic; Make it a lifestyle change

You Can’t Do It

  • Don’t believe it!
  • You can do it.
  • Don’t worry about anyone else.
  • Don’t compete with others or try to look like anyone else.
  • You can become the perfect you.
  • Create reachable goals and be happy with the body that you have
  • Be healthy, fit, and happy with a realistic lifestyle (not a quick fad diet or workout plan); You only live once so make it the best you can.
  • Don’t be too hard on yourself, but don’t be a slacker either

Healthy

Have a happy and healthy new year everyone!

We would love to hear from you on what you think about this post.  We sincerely appreciate all your comments.

If you like this post please share it with friends. And feel free to contact us if you would like to discuss ideas for your next project!

Sincerely,
Frank Cunha III
I Love My Architect – Facebook

FC3 ARCHITECTURE+DESIGN, LLC
P.O. Box 335, Hamburg, NJ 07419
e-mail: fcunha@fc3arch.com
mobile: 201.681.3551
direct: 973.970.3551
fax: 973.718.4641
web: http://fc3arch.com
Licensed in NJ, NY, PA, DE, CT.


Greatest Milestones of My Life (so far)

BY FRANK CUNHA III

  • Growing up in the city
    • Living in the city gave me some street smarts (if not much street cred)
    • You can take the boy out of the city but you can never take the city out of the boy
    • The city taught me the importance of straight lines

FAMILY AT VERONA PARK
Photo: Dee Portera Photography
Edited Frank Cunha III
http://deeporteraphotography.com
http://frankcunha.com

  • Working on my grandparents farm for the summer
    • Connection to nature and the earth
    • Appreciation for agriculture and “real” food that comes from the earth
    • Hard work never hurt anyone
    • Hard work can be fun if you are surrounded with people you love and respect
    • Satisfaction from seeing your hard work pay off during harvest season
    • The country taught me the importance of curves and detours
  • Joining the sports team
    • Gave me a great appreciation for my personal health, fitness, and wellbeing
    • My parents would always take us out to the park
    • I learned that even though I wasn’t the strongest, fasted, or most talented I could still become the best I could be if I worked hard
    • I still use the basics of discipline and persistence I learned playing sports as a kid to get me through the tough times today
    • Watching my father organize a soccer league taught me to respect the community and give back – A lot of kids were kept off the streets and out of trouble thanks to my dad (and my mom who was his silent partner, doing the behind the scenes things)
  • Going to private school
    • It’s where I learned to draw a circle
    • It’s where I learned that kids/people can be mean
    • It’s where I learned that I was creative
    • It’s where they asked me to look out for a “calling” and where I found my calling to become an Architect
    • It’s where I learned discipline (and how to diagram a sentence, Thank you Sr. Siprian)
    • Gave me faith, something to believe in; even when I stray I still remember the simple rules of “Do On To Others What Thou Would Want Done Onto You” and “Turn the Other Cheek”

FRANK & CINDY AT VERONA PARK
Photo: Dee Portera Photography
Edited Frank Cunha III
http://deeporteraphotography.com
http://frankcunha.com

  • Meeting my wife
    • It’s when I learned to let go and fall in love again
    • It helped me find true love, my true soul mate and life companion
    • Having someone there for me through good and bad makes life better
    • It gave me my greatest gift and joy in life – My family, my kids
  • Becoming a dad
    • My children keep me young
    • My children give me a deeper appreciation for my parents and all the sacrifices they made for me
    • They inspire me through the hard times
    • They let me rest easy knowing that the values my parents and grandparents taught me will be passed on to their children and grandchildren
  • Becoming an Architect
    • Getting my license to practice Architect was one of my greatest accomplishments
    • Architecture defines me and what I do (even when I am not practicing Architecture)
    • Using my talent for good makes me feel good
    • Although it is never easy or simple I enjoy the entire process of design and construction and my involvement

KIDS WITH SANTA CLAUS & MRS. CLAUS
OLDE LAFAYETTE VILLAGE
Photo: Frank Cunha III
http://frankcunha.com

Related Posts:

Kids

Meet the Cunha Boys

David

Daniel

Frankie

Having Fun

Fanatical

Hair Cuts

Kids With Grandparents

Hanging out in NYCity

Halloween

My Architecture Manifesto

My Strange and Wonderful Eyes

The 10 Most Important Things I Learned From My Parents And Hope to Teach My Kids

We would love to hear from you on what you think about this post.  We sincerely appreciate all your comments.

If you like this post please share it with friends. And feel free to contact us if you would like to discuss ideas for your next project!

Sincerely,
Frank Cunha III
I Love My Architect – Facebook

FC3 ARCHITECTURE+DESIGN, LLC
P.O. Box 335, Hamburg, NJ 07419
e-mail: fcunha@fc3arch.com
mobile: 201.681.3551
direct: 973.970.3551
fax: 973.718.4641
web: http://fc3arch.com
Licensed in NJ, NY, PA, DE, CT.


Ignite and Soar by @FrankCunhaIII

As the intense passion of one’s soul ignites a tiny little spark in youth, it remains hidden in our own heart waiting for a special moment in time when it can be set free, perhaps a time when we are more mature and ready for the responsibility that comes from our untethered energy fueled by love, lust, and passion for one’s true destiny, as one continues to seek and find one’s self, in oneself, establishing ourselves and recreating one’s infinite identity uncensored through time and space, encouraging others to do the same, creating an uncontrollable fire so intense that it engulfs all other matter in a way unknown to our fellow human beings, which creates an entirely new world filled with love, hope, joy, as well as wealth and health for all our brothers and sisters, as we continue to search for our own self identity in others, it is deeply buried in our own heart and soul, suppressed by the firefighting bureaucrats that remain in control until this very moment of undeniable ignition, this moment in time.  Created in our thought in youth, now realized at the appropriate time, when nothing else can be lost, we have everything to gain and conquer.  All I ask of you now is to assist me by blowing ever so gently, yet intensely into my sails as I lift up high above this earth, and I promise to do the same for you.  This journey is not one that we can go on alone, although it is in this state of loneliness from which we enter and depart this cold world.  We long for those brief moments in our lives when we touch others in ways which cannot be described here (but I know you know what I’m talking about).  In these moments we find our life, our eternal flame which can never be put out, less of all by them, and as they continue to try, they soon find that the flame is ignited even brighter and much, much stronger with the help of our true friends.  You know who you are and I’m eternally grateful for your love and support and want you to know when you feel most alone, you can feel my warm breath of love and encouragement for you, because although we are born and die alone, there are these few moments when we truly connect with a special few people, you know who you are.  Ignite the fire within and have the strength and courage to be you, I will help lift you high in flight to help you soar, higher and higher, as we learn to live the life we should, when we follow that tiny little spark created a long time ago. That is who you are, this is who I am.  Individually, we succeed, moment to moment, but together we build a fire so intense that no army can fight, the spark of love will light our way and lift our souls, glory and gratitude transform, hearts soar. Be true to your soul and let your flame guide your way upward beyond the clouds.

(Photo “Above the Moon You Can Soar!” taken by Frank Cunha III on January 18, 2010)

If you like this post please share it with friends. And feel free to contact us if you would like to discuss ideas for your next project!

Sincerely,
Frank Cunha III
I Love My Architect – Facebook

FC3 ARCHITECTURE+DESIGN, LLC
P.O. Box 335, Hamburg, NJ 07419
e-mail: fcunha@fc3arch.com
mobile: 201.681.3551
direct: 973.970.3551
fax: 973.718.4641
web: http://www.fc3arch.com
Licensed in NJ, NY, PA, DE, CT.


Temporary Setbacks, Bureaucratic Regulations, and Inter-Disciplinary Cross-Training by @FrankCunhaIII

Sometimes things don’t go our way.

Sometimes things take a turn for the worst.

Sometimes we find ourselves in a place where things can’t get worse (can they?).

When a person reaches a certain level of despair, there is no place else to go but up.

When things appear bleak and hopeless, that is when we must muster up all our courage and inner strength and believe in ourselves.

We have been training hard at what we do.

We have been practicing, honing our skills.

We have been preparing for something better, our own personal best for a while now.

Then along comes the non-elected officials of an organization implementing a brand new set of  rules, laws, and functions.

Just when we start getting into a rhythm, they change the rules (again)….

Even through the darkest and thickest forest of bureaucracy there are rays of hope that can re-light the fire in our hearts to help us see our way through. (Photo: Frank Cunha III)

That is where we must face the new challenges.

Change our patterns of behavior!

Like an athlete training in sports other than the one he/she competes in with a goal of improving overall performance, we too must take advantage of the particular effectiveness of each training method (outside of our own expertise), while at the same time attempting to negate the shortcomings of that method by combining it with other methods that address its weaknesses.

Inter-disciplinary cross-training involves the combining of two or more disciplines into one activity (e.g. a research project, competition, etc).  It is about creating something brand new that the world has never seen before.  We do this by crossing boundaries, and thinking across them.  (Think peanut butter and jelly (or chocolate), Abraham Lincoln and Vampires, to name a few, and this Architectural reference by Bernard Tschumi.)

Persist, adapt, evolve, and Succeed!

That is the only way to come out ahead!

Like a wide-eyed babe we mus allow the glimmer of light an hope to fill our hearts and lift our souls! (Photo: Frank Cunha III)

If you like this post please share it with friends. And feel free to contact us if you would like to discuss ideas for your next project!

Sincerely,
Frank Cunha III
I Love My Architect – Facebook

FC3 ARCHITECTURE+DESIGN, LLC
P.O. Box 335, Hamburg, NJ 07419
e-mail: fcunha@fc3arch.com
mobile: 201.681.3551
direct: 973.970.3551
fax: 973.718.4641
web: http://www.fc3arch.com
Licensed in NJ, NY, PA, DE, CT.


@2BFitLori – Motivation Exposé #Fitness #WeightLoss #Motivation #Inspiration

I recently had the pleasure of interviewing one of my Instagram friends, Lori Ross, who has inspired countless of men and women to start losing the weight, stay in shape, and begin a healthy lifestyle. I Love My Architect is primarily about Art & Architecture and sometimes we take a side trip to document some cool photo gear, poetry, or other interests. Once I read Lori’s posts on Instagram and saw her transformation I wanted to share her journey with you all. Over the past 12 months I have lost 20 or so pounds and recently started working out. It isn’t easy but once you start and see the results it’s hard to stop. Looking back at old photos or checking the waist line on your old pants is a great way to stay motivated. I hope this expose inspires you to Start or Keep Going.

1) Lori, thanks for agreeing to do this. I know it must be difficult to talk about at times, but I wanted to share your success story with the world. Can you tell us about your journey?

LR: My journey started long before I ever even knew it existed. It started in my mind. Food became my drug of choice to silence all the thoughts and feelings I couldn’t handle throughout my life. This journey has been about finding myself and who I really am. I let myself finally feel what I had been supressing all my life through food. I decided to take back the control over my own mind, left my job of 14 years to finally make myself a priority. I reached out, hired a trainer, started eating right, laughed, cried, fought my way back, and here I am, not even a full year later….down 100 pounds!

2) Wow, that is amazing! At what point did you realize that you HAD to make a change in your life and how did you find the WILL and DESIRE to change your habits?
LR: I’ve yoyo’d my entire life, once weighing in at 289 pounds. Tried many many times to lose the weight, dropping about 50 pounds and putting it right back on. Never knowing why, until finally, I reached the deepest darkest place that was consuming my life, consuming my mind and my health. Depression was taking over. I wasn’t living, I was merely existing, slowly killing myself with food. I remember just wanting the pain to end, the pain in my mind. Finally realizing that no one could make the change except me. I, myself, had to become MY priority, or I would live in this pain forever. The WILL and DESIRE have to come from within. I finally gave myself permission to Love ME!

3) What do you want to tell people when they see these 10-minute abs videos, diet books and fad diets ads online and on television?
LR: If you don’t love yourself and have the right mindset, it won’t matter what FAD you accept into your life, it won’t take hold and last. You have to be willing to put yourself first. Believe me, I’ve tried almost everything, thinking that I was willing to try anything just to be thin, when in fact, I first needed to love myself. There’s no easy fix, if you aren’t willing to make a permanent change in your mind and how you see yourself, nothing will become consistent. I’ve always said, consistency is key, and it is, consistently loving yourself, consistently checking your mindset, consistently feeding your mind with positive thinking.

4) How do you stay motivated to keep going?
LR: My motivation has finally come from knowing my own self-worth. Believing in my strength and ability to love myself unconditionally. There can be no other motivation as powerful as that. Once you know you are worth more, you will have more. Nothing will be greater than keeping the balance in your life that allows yourself to become free and self determined to keep that feeling internally. I often look back at where I was, just to remember where I don’t want to return to. This is what keeps me going! I AM WORTH IT!

5) Since you like to pause and look back to see where you don’t want to be again, have you considered starting a blog to help motivate others by sharing how you have overcome your greatest challenges. How has this reflection helped you.
LR: I have considered starting a blog, or facebook page in order to help others. I am currently writing a book to detail my own journey. I have much knowledge and information I want to share with the world. My passion now lies in passing along this information and motivating others to make the change. I know it’s difficult, I’ve been there and I intend to help others any way I can. Reflecting on all of this brings me to tears. It’s actually a very emotional subject for me, but that’s what makes me so passionate about it. It’s a personal journey that I understand, and can bring to people. Reflecting on the past makes me stay the course, focused, determined to be the best me I can be. Reflecting on the present, I am confident, strong and self determined now and nothing will get in my way.

6) Where can our readers find out more about you and see your transformation?
How has social media impacted your life?
LR: I currently am on the Instagram App and Path App as the user name, Lori Pic. I am on Twitter as LoriMom, yes, I have 3 kids. Since Instagram and posting my journey on there, it has shown me what an impact the social media can make on others and helping to bring others to health/fitness and happiness. That’s why now, I intend to start a Blog, possibly a facebook page, and as I stated earlier I’m writing a book I hope to publish. The Social Media has given me a certain amount of strength as well. When people are motivated by your accomplishments, it drives you to want to do your best. All of my followers have been nothing short of wonderful and part of my journey. You would be surprised how some of them have helped me.

7) What’s the next stop on your journey?
LR: The next step for me right now at this very moment is to stay focused! Always Love myself! I’m currently training for a photoshoot once I hit my goal; (which is very soon). I am also studying to become a personal trainer. I am going to keep working on my book and getting it published. This journey will never be over for me, but I’m in control now, not the food. Fitness will forever be a part of my life. I’ve never felt this good….not ever!
Thank you Frank for being a part of my journey and for this opportunity to ‘Detour’ on your Blog! I hope I can help anyone out there who is struggling as I once was…..
Thanks again,
Much Love,
Lori

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Sincerely,
Frank Cunha III
I Love My Architect – Facebook